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March 16, 2005

Freedom On The March In Iran?

rafsan-2.jpg From IranPressNews, something you won't see in the New York Times, (via Dave Mendoza):

According to received reports from various cities in Iran, today which marks the first celebration of the Iranian New Year's Festival of Fire was met with celebrations as well as huge protests and demonstrations against the Islamic regime of Iran. The protestors chanted: "We need no Sheikh or Mullah, we curse YOU - RUHOLLAH!"

A report from Tehran: Young celebrants today set scarecrows in the likeness of various Mullahs, such as Khamenei, Rafsanjani, Khatami, Sharoudi, Jannati, etc. on fire in the streets. They cried out slogans such as: "Referendum, referendum, this is the people's dictum."

In another area of the city people took to setting the French flag on fire while chanting: "Europe is finished and so are their Mullahs." OR "Bush, Bush, where is Bush?" (In Persian this rhymes: Bush, Bush, kush, kush!).

Like last year's celebration, the brave women who also participating in the celebrations removed their headscarves, stomping and dancing.

In the town of Karaj, near Tehran, people chanted: "Death to Khamenei" as the brutal revolutionary forces took chains and batons to people, severly beating and injuring many.

In the Southern city of Ahvaaz, on the Iran/Iraq border and the surrounding townships celebrants also came out in droves, confronting the regime's thugs. In the Shi'ite holy city of Mash'had, the city closest to the border of Afghanistan, where anti-regime and anti-Mullah fervour has always been most impressive, large groups of celebrants were arrested and detained.

Sadly, these Iranian Freedom Fighters aren't likely to receive much attention from the Blogosphere, not having had the foresight (like their more media-savvy compadres in Lebanon) to place the obligatory busty wench or two on their shoulders before marching bravely off to meet the foe). All of which began to arouse my suspicions... how could this be a real revolution? No hot babes. The vaunted "Arab street", rising for... Dubya? B..b.b...but they hate us for our arrogant unilateralist ways! John Kerry says so! How could this be?

Knowing how unreliable Achmed-on-the-spot reports can be, I went to the real pros - the always-impartial BBC, for some hard-hitting hotel-bar journalism. Oddly, however, there was no mention of any pro-Bush sentiment in their report, which just confirmed my suspicion that someone was pulling my leg:

There have been noisy and in places unruly street celebrations in Iran to mark the annual Festival of Fire, an annual ritual that dates back to pre-Islamic times.

See? All that talk of beatings and such was just a silly misunderstanding! Bloody wankers....have another pina colada and kick back.

State-run media said at least 15 people had been injured in Tehran alone as people jumped over bonfires and let off fireworks to celebrate Chahar Shanbe Suri, a festival marking the end of the Persian year.

Now see! Another consequence of irresponsible American foreign policy! If the U.S. required all its trading partners to have strict regulatory agencies, as John Kerry advocated during the election, there would be none of this silly jumping over bonfires. And every Iranian would have free government health care, to protect them from all of life's unfortunate vicissitudes.

The festival, known as the Festival of Fire, has its origins in the ancient Zoroastrian religion, and Muslim clerics have tried to discourage it.

Well, if those horrid peasants are chanting "death to the Mullahs" and burning them in effigy, it's perfectly understandable why the clergy would take a rather dim view of the festivities... Let's check another source:

Violent clashes rocked, today, the City of Oshnovieh as brutal militiamen attacked the youth who were showing joy due to the approach of the traditional "Tchahr Shanbe Souri" (Fire Fiest).

Islamic regime forces attacked tens of young who were soon supported by hundreds of residents who retaliated to the regime use of clubs and Tear-gas with powerful hand made grenades and Molotov Cocktails. Overwhelmed official forces had to pull back at several occasions while the streets' initiative felt into residents hands.

Women were seen throwing stones and even eggs on the security forces which resulted in heavy damages made to several patrol cars and injured several militiamen.

Soon the increasing crowd marched in the city and damaged several official buildings and banks' on its way. Angry demonstrators shouted slogans against the regime and its leaders, such as, "Marg bar Jomhoori e Eslami" (Down with Islamic Republic).

Well these are clearly just silly, hot-headed young fools, prating on about democracy and freedom and the like. Everyone knows the Arab world isn't ready for democracy. All they want to do is establish a bloody theocracy and destroy the world.

Fortunately, not everyone is fooled by these young hotheads. There are a few seasoned American legislators who haven't completely lost their sanity:

A column in the Boston Globe the other day noted that "Senator Joseph Biden said that...the world needed to address...Iran's emotional needs, he said, with a nonaggression pact."

That sounds about right to us. Have another drink, and then we can all complain about how Bush isn't doing anything about the nukes in Iran.

Posted by Cassandra at March 16, 2005 06:30 AM

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These Iranian protesters must be considered liberals in their country. Why you ask? Because (1) they are protesting (2) they are unruly and (3) they are adept at slogans that rhyme.

Posted by: KJ at March 16, 2005 09:55 AM

Well if they're liberals then they have no business supporting a psychotic murderer like George Bush.

That's it. I'm moving to Canada where I can have true freedom of speech.

Posted by: Susan Sarandon at March 16, 2005 10:13 AM


Posted by: Cricket at March 16, 2005 11:16 AM

Blasted hippies...
Don't they have jobs they could go to?

Posted by: Masked MenaceĀ© at March 16, 2005 11:31 AM

Now see here -- some of my best friends have been "busty wenches" (God love 'em).

Posted by: George at March 16, 2005 11:46 AM

A column in the Boston Globe the other day noted that "Senator Joseph Biden said that...the world needed to address...Iran's emotional needs, he said, with a nonaggression pact."

What a great idea, I'll bet Stalin wished he'd signed a similar document with Hitler ... would have saved Russia some terrible suffering.

Posted by: Frodo at March 16, 2005 11:51 AM

Since this about Iran, isn't it "Persian Street" and not "Arab Street".

Posted by: Grumpy at March 16, 2005 01:33 PM

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