Villainous Company

I'm a West Virginian, born and raised, and I'd be very offended if I knew what this "Kansas" place was. It must be farther than a tank of gas.

What do you mean? Further than a full tank of gas?

You gotta stop at a half tank, otherwise how'n'ever you plannin' on gettin' back?

Kansas and Nebraska and Wyoming. Three places where the scenery improves at night along the interstate.

You gotta stop at a half tank...

Fractions? That's revenuer talk.

Even Cleveland looks exciting next to Topeka!

Too frackin' funny.

Cricket just lost *her* invitation to the Castle...

And I think the residents of Wyoming are going... eh? Yellowstone, Jackson's Hole... where this womyn been?

Luckily (for Jackson Hole and Yellowstone) the prettiest places in Wyoming are NOT along the interstate. Eastern Wyoming is not Nearly as pretty as the western part.

Kansas, God's proving ground as he developed the concept of "flat"...

Don't worry, Cricket, I'll sign you in as a "guest"!

Spoken with the interesting viewpoint of someone who lives in Flatland Washington... though the scenery improves to the east...

Feh! We may not have hills... but we *do* have valleys.

And if you are a geologist/geographer, you'll understand!~

Pllllllpt!

And the people in Evanston observe, "We have an interstate!"

So, am I desperate enough here?

Kansas does, indeed, have valleys.

In New Jersey, though, we call 'em storm drains...

John - Just because you never saw Rainier while you were at Fort Lewis, doesn't mean it isn't there!

Western Washington is not very flat...

I did too see the Big Pimple. Once. Which is more than a lot of Seattlites have seen it!

I crossed Kansas once, on my way to Oklahoma. I remember Wichita because of the the big hanger with planes in front of it. Or might that have been Tinker AFB?

Cheers

I have driven across Nebraska many times. The scenery doesn't get better...it stays the same. Most of the trees you see (the five out there) are near bodies of water (so the cattle may have shade, don'tcha know).

Iowa is probably just as boring, I haven't driven across it...just used to live there...

Not anymore!

In self defense I did say interstate, as during many vacations and DITY moves, we always seemed to be going either east or west as the sun came up or set, respectively.

Wyoming has a chain for a wind sock.

Nebraska has head winds no matter which way you drive through that state.

Kansas is pretty in the east, and then lengthens out to flat and wheat for miles and miles and miles...

Then there is the mystery of eastern Colorado.

And though I am from Arizona, I-40 is a challenge too.

Don't get me wrong; I love the wide open spaces
and America is a beautiful country. I am glad that I got a chance to see it like that. However, I am equally glad that our moving days are over and we have a chance to put down some roots.

In Nebraska, you slap 'The Club' on the steering wheel, set the cruise control and get some shut eye while the car does the rest.

"Flat" Eastern Washington... Uh-huh...

Grab your ruck and let's do about ten miles... Then count the number of time we both complain about "this dagnabbed hill"!

When I was growing up in Vegas, Johnny Carson told a joke in his monologue about the difference between Las Vegas women and parrots: You can teach a parrot to say "NO". The whole town went apeshit. A boycott was threatened. The Vegas mayor demanded an apology from Carson and NBC. So Johnny came out a couple nights later and did a whole bit called "Lighten up Las Vegas", and told about 20 rapid-fire Vegas jokes. If Hallmark had any guts, they'd do a whole line of "Topeka Sucks" cards.