June 09, 2006
Life Sucks. And Then You Die.
It's a jungle out there. No, really:
"You weren't supposed to be graduating into an America fighting a misbegotten war in a foreign land. You weren't supposed to be graduating into a world where we are still fighting for fundamental human rights, be it the rights of immigrants to start a new life; the rights of gays to marry; or the rights of women to choose. You weren't supposed to be graduating into a world where oil still drives policy and environmentalists have to relentlessly fight for every gain. You weren't. But you are. And for that I'm sorry."
– New York Times Publisher Arthur Sulzberger Jr., at the May 21 commencement address at New Paltz University of the State University of New York.
And watch out for the freaking Girl Scouts:
I've been taking my daughter around the block lately, helping her unload Girl Scout cookies on obliging neighbors -- and wondering whether we're killing them. The problem is that most of those Girl Scout cookies have trans fatty acids. Those are the worst kind of fat, killing far more Americans than Al Qaeda manages to."
– From Nicholas Kristof’s May 21 column.
Posted by Cassandra at June 9, 2006 06:44 PM
I personally love the thin mints. However, with only 10% going to the local troops and the rest to the greedy capitalists in the organization, I buy either:
Mint Oreos (chocolate covered or the neon green filling)
One stop shopping for all your mint/chocolate needs.
Posted by: Cricket at June 9, 2006 08:21 PM
DEATH BY GIRL SCOUT!!!
I can think of worse ways to go...
Posted by: camojack at June 9, 2006 08:40 PM
Hm... my mother sent me a whole shipment of Girl Scout Cookies this year, for me and her grandson according to the note. Perhaps it's time I saw Medea again...
Posted by: Grim at June 9, 2006 09:44 PM
I'm with Cricket. I personally love the thin mints also. What a way too go. I did not know that the 'evil' corporations gained 90% of the profite. How terrible. Better to give them the whole 100% of the profits to Nabisco for their Oreos or to the Keebler elves (what do they need money for?)
Posted by: JJJet at June 9, 2006 10:15 PM
Girl Scouts? Why that was where I got my start on the road to being evil. There was even one year where I was top cookie seller. Yep, picture in the paper with my evil Brownie uniform on....the whole nine yards.
Posted by: Maggie at June 9, 2006 11:13 PM
There is still time to repent for your youthful misdeeds. :)
From now on, you must work for the benefit of gay-transgendered illegal immigrants, to make a new life in Amerika, by buying them a subscription to "Times Select".
Posted by: Don Brouhaha at June 10, 2006 10:53 AM
Yes, I want Oreo and Keeble and Pepperidge Farm to know I support their capitalist efforts in keeping their product available year round, and not sending pigtailed little girls into harm's way by asking their parents to hawk the GS wares at Wal-Mart, Publix or BJ's.
Posted by: Cricket at June 10, 2006 11:22 AM
A Picture is worth a thousand words.
Posted by: Joatmoaf at June 10, 2006 01:30 PM
Afghanistan, 2002, MRE's everyday for a month...then, a C-130 lands...4, count 'em, 4 pallets of Girl Scout Cookies! God Bless those little girls!! Trans-fatty acids be damned!
Posted by: SFC D at June 10, 2006 05:30 PM
HAHAHA!!! Those quotes are priceless.
G-d bless all the freakin' moonbats and their self-indulgent misery. At least they keep me amused.
I scarf down one box of DoSiDos each year (usually within hours of purchase).
Posted by: Janette at June 10, 2006 10:58 PM
Posted by: spd rdr at June 11, 2006 12:07 AM
A net.friend of mine passed on a tale of going shopping and coming upon a table some Girl Scouts had setup, selling their cookies. There was a sign setup saying:
"RESISTANCE IS FUTILE"
...or something like that. Eeeeeeevil. (...and I tend to finish off the Thin Mints at an alarming rate, so I guess it's truth in advertising.) ;)
Posted by: Patrick Chester at June 11, 2006 01:51 PM
Are Girl Scout cookies now a tool of terrorism? Perish the thought! What kind of Communist-apologist, anti-American, freedom-hating, Al-Qaeda-supporting Neanderthal would even think such a thing?!
What is this country coming to, I ask you?
Posted by: Robbie at June 12, 2006 11:36 AM
God help me I keep picturing OBL in a Girl Scout Uniform now, and the milk and cookies are hurting my nose.
Stop it, Stop it Now!
Posted by: bill millan at August 30, 2006 02:40 AM