« The Commute From Hell | Main | What We Owe »
November 01, 2006
10 Reasons To Join The Marine Team
1. Marines have the best uniforms, hands down. And as everyone knows, chicks really dig a guy in uniform.
2. Who else are you gonna call when it absolutely, positively must be destroyed overnite? Marines know how to fight:
In the true spirit of "jointness" I offer the following as "Everything you need to know about differences in service culture. All in good fun, of course.US Marine Corps Rules for Gunfighting
1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a "4."
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.Navy SEAL Rules For Gunfighting
1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Return quickly to looking cool in latest beach wear.
4. Check hair in mirror.US Army Ranger Rules For Gunfighting
1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound pack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from "Higher" to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.Army Rules for Gunfighting
1. Select a new beret to wear.
2. Sew combat patch on right shoulder.
3. Change the color of beret you decide to wear.US Air Force Rules For Gunfighting
1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what's on HBO.
4. Determine "what is a gunfight."
5. Request more funding from Congress with a "killer" PowerPoint presentation.
6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets "strategic" and never deploy them operationally.
9. Tell the Navy to send the Marines.US Navy Rules For Gunfighting
1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee.
3. Watch porn.
4. Send the Marines.KEITH J. PAVLISCHEK
COLONEL, U.S. MARINES
3. Oddly enough, being the smallest of the services has forced us to be creative. Marines fight smarter, not harder. Jim Mattis wasn't kidding when he said the Marine style is a blend of chivalry and ferocity: no better friend, no worse enemy.
4. The Marine Corps Silent Drill Team. Poetry in motion.
5. Tradition and history: we still celebrate ours. Mess nites, dinings in and out, St. Barbara's day and the Marine Corps Ball: no one celebrates their rich history with more flair and elan than the Marine Corps. We still dress for dinner, we still pull out cigars and the smoking lamp for the men (and sometimes the ladies!).
We still light candles in memory of fallen comrades and those who have been wounded in the service of this nation. We do not forget. If you've ever been invited to a Marine Ball, don't pass up the opportunity to attend. Those of use who have passed the quarter century mark may roll our eyes a bit but we still go every year and we still tear up when the same old passages are read. What began on November 10, 1775 in Tun Tavern is still remembered in giant ballrooms, decorated hangars, and dingy conference rooms as Marines gather as one family to celebrate that which unites and binds us: a love of Corps, country, and above all, each other.
6. Esprit de corps: Which, as you should know, is no cheese-eating surrender monkey Phrench-sounding label but something each Marine takes to heart on the day he or she finally earns the right to be called "Marine". Every Marine is a rifleman. To call the average Marine a soldier, troop, sailor, or airman to is risk a speedy and ungentle correction. There are only Marines, an appellation which (unlike soldiers, sailors, or airmen) is always capitalized. Now *that's* respect.)
7. Toughest mascot. Think about it:
Army: a mule
Air Force: a stinkin' bird?
Navy: ummm... a goat
Marines: a bulldog. Nuff said.
8. Marine PT. Did the HVES mention that we were better-looking? (You're welcome, Cat... Dear God, I think she just fainted.)
9. Marine wives. There is an old Spanish saying, "No hay rosas sin espinas." I think it fits Marine wives well: tough, but tender, beautiful but enduring. On the day my husband finally leaves the Corps, my most precious memories will be of the officer and enlisted wives I have been privileged to work with, laugh with, cry with, and share this wacky thrill ride that is military life.
10. The Navy-Marine Corps team: as much as we love to rib the Navy, we couldn't do our job without them. On any Marine base, along with green you'll see Navy khaki. Navy corpsmen go to battle with us and dress our wounds. They are at once healers, life savers, and soldiers as tough and brave as any Marine. Navy chaplains pray with us and bury our dead. They weep with us and help us to try and make sense of the incomprehensible.
And it is Navy ships which carry us to distant shores so we can do what we do best: respond as America's 9/11 force. They provide devastating firepower on target when we need it. We are proud to be a part of the sea service. But that said....until November 11th...
Beat Navy!
Still not convinced? Here are 224 more reasons to Join the Marine team
Donate now, and spread the word at every blog you comment at! The Marine team needs YOU!
Posted by Cassandra at November 1, 2006 06:23 AM
Comments
Uh, you might wanna rethink the 'cheat' part of winning to 'adapting,' as cheating puts whiny snot nosed liberals in a snit as they look up parts of the Geneva convention that they think apply, or some ephemeral 'feeling' that they think is common to their lowest denominator.
Just sayin.
Posted by: Cricket at November 1, 2006 07:57 AM
And the mule is a smart animal. They know when to work, are sure footed in treacherous terrain
and know when to quit.
A bird: A bald eagle who is a raptor, a hunter.
Goats have a sixth sense regarding danger, and the males will stand their ground. They don't know the meaning of fear.
Now, a bulldog, all you have to do is toss him a bone.
heh.
Posted by: Cricket at November 1, 2006 08:01 AM
Regarding that calendar...
Oh momma!!!!
Posted by: Carrie at November 1, 2006 08:08 AM
Another name for a mule is an a$$ :D
And as for goats... Baaaaaaa!!!
*running away*
Posted by: Cassandra at November 1, 2006 08:10 AM
goes to find bigger, STALE marshmallows....
Posted by: Carrie at November 1, 2006 08:11 AM
re: cheating
Yeah, I wasn't too thrilled with that part of it either Cricket, but overall I thought it was pretty funny. For instance, I hardly think "have a plan to kill everyone you meet" was meant entirely seriously :)
Posted by: Cassandra at November 1, 2006 08:13 AM
Done! SF
Posted by: Pia at November 1, 2006 08:20 AM
Oh, I know that, but what I was thinking of when I read that was that scene in "Hamburger Hill."
Clint Eastwood is defending one of his guys and he rather emphatically growls: "He overcame, he adapted!" Dang straight. His guy didn't cheat.
Just used his training when he needed and where it counted.
You mean, 'half-assed,' don't you?
Bulldogs are just the friedliest things. Give them scritches and a chew toy and they will do anything for you and follow you anywhere.
Posted by: Cricket at November 1, 2006 08:29 AM
STALE marshmallows? Those would really hurt!
*starts crying again*
Posted by: Cricket at November 1, 2006 08:31 AM
My brother is a Marine, and he's just as dumb as Kerry descibed.
Go Navy!
Posted by: Frank J. at November 1, 2006 09:06 AM
Ah, but Frank... that could be genetics :D We can't screen 'em all out, you know... heh.
Posted by: Cassandra at November 1, 2006 09:15 AM
Re: Cheating,
One of my several mottos is: "If you're not cheating, you're not trying."
Posted by: Grim at November 1, 2006 09:17 AM
That "plan to kill" thing was probably the first time I appeared on BlackFive. It's meant quite seriously.
Posted by: Grim at November 1, 2006 09:19 AM
Ah. But let us suppose there are the Rules of Engagement, the Other Rules that Govern our Behavior In Warfare. If those rules conflict with the training, then what takes precedence?
You see, to be truly adaptive, one turns a disadvantage to an advantage using their training within the rules.
Just an observation...the closest thing I can think of is loading the bases and then walking
the fourth batter to score one home run if you need to win by one point.
All within the rules, a strategy, if you will.
Of course, in a combat situation that isn't always a clear thing, so adapt is a better word.
Posted by: Cricket at November 1, 2006 09:29 AM
Don't cry, Cricket..
I have chocolate...
Posted by: Carrie at November 1, 2006 09:50 AM
Aw, thanks. And to go with the chocolate, I have
some cranberry pecan scones.
And for the record, I have called my son's school about Valour-IT. No response yet, but since they are doing a Veteran's Day program, and honoring local veterans (that's a shocker, now isn't it?) I thought they could at least get the literature, make the necessary calls and so forth.
And I will follow up on it.
I also have given the intel to other retirees
of various services. I haven't mentioned the Sibling Rivalry...I sorta want them to make their own decision, but I did mention the blogs
so they could enter in to the fun of it.
I am not being pushy, just supportive. And that Reminds Me...the VFW will be having their campaign drive, so I will be calling our local VFW group here and mentioning it to them.
On second thought, NO I WON'T. I have a son who needs to Get Involved In A Scouting Thing, so I will let HIM do it.
Yeah. Delegate.
Posted by: Cricket at November 1, 2006 10:06 AM
So far a good job Marines. I have no idea what happened to the Navy, looks like they either blew a boiler or ... they are sandbagging.
Do they know the competition started already?
Posted by: jim b at November 1, 2006 12:08 PM
♪♪♪♪All I want for Christmas is a CAL-EN-DAR..A Cal-En-Dar...A Cal-en-dar....♪♪♪♪....
Ay caramba! Funny how quick the Colorado weather changes. We had an overnite lo of 19 last night and all of a sudden, I think it's 108......indoors!!........Hmmm...but the heat just kicked on..??? No "hot flashes"...hmm...?? Furnace must need attention...err...fixing...uhm....Gotta GO!
I guess I'm going for a HOT Calendar motif for 2007. A friend just brought back for me a hot air balloon calendar from the MONDO annual Balloon Fiesta in Albuquerque, and SURELY someone will come through for me with the #1 item on my Christmas wish list.
My desktop is due new wallpaper. Too bad I won't be getting much work done, though. heh
Posted by: Rocky Mtn. Lioness at November 1, 2006 01:09 PM
"Ah. But let us suppose there are the Rules of Engagement, the Other Rules that Govern our Behavior In Warfare. If those rules conflict with the training, then what takes precedence?"
The training. You can't expect people to do extended abstract reasoning in combat. Training is what outs.
The Marines 'train as they fight,' though, in order to ensure that there is the smallest possible degree of conflict. The basic rules are inculcated time and again. People know what's expected of them.
Still, there is a certain ethic at work here. I remember talking to a couple of Marine Reservists about a training session they conducted in a subdivision that was still under construction. First thing they did? Bust out windows to clear fields of fire. They had just been told not to do that. But -- fight as you train, train as you fight.
Posted by: Grim at November 1, 2006 01:09 PM
I am very pleased to note that though Marines comprise of, roughly, 10% of the Armed Forces, Marines can and do generate around 25% of the ValourIT goals!
"The Marines have done so much with so litle for so long they can do anything with nothing forever! "unknown author...been around for decades...
Semper Fi Marines!
Posted by: Roy Kaufmann at November 1, 2006 03:49 PM
Hey Cricket, first get your movies straight it wasen't "Hamburger Hill" it was Heart Break Ridge.
Posted by: Marine at November 15, 2006 12:32 PM