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October 20, 2008

Oh Dear God....

Is nothing sacred?

Drinking a lot of coffee reduces the size of many women's breasts, a Swedish researcher finds.

Helena Jernstrom, an oncologist at Lund University in southern Sweden, said that the effect is the result of a gene that about half of women possess, The Local reported.

"Drinking coffee can have a major effect on breast size," she said.

Jernstrom became interested in the subject because of research that has shown that large-breasted women are more likely to be diagnosed with breast cancer, while downing at least three cups of coffee a day reduces cancer risk. She decided to look for a correlation directly between drinking coffee and breast size and found one.

And up next on "I want that job" : when the "Friendly Skies" become a little too friendly...

...the scanners, which are to be used on domestic passengers at Melbourne Airport for the next six weeks, will show the "private parts" of travelers but will blur their faces to protect their privacy, the Daily Mail reported Wednesday.

*sigh*

Posted by Cassandra at October 20, 2008 07:18 AM

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Comments

Any thoughts on Politico.com's top story today about Michelle Obama establishing military families as her special cause and the primary focus of her tenure as First Lady if Obama wins?

Posted by: emjay at October 20, 2008 08:32 AM

coffee reduces breast size? Oh dear. Someone get Dolly Parton a Starbucks gift card!

Posted by: airforcewife at October 20, 2008 09:26 AM

I'm wondering if Doc Jernstrom merely observed that ladies who are waifishly slender 'twixt neck and waistband appear to haunt Stahbux and drew the wrong conclusion.

Or not...

Posted by: BillT at October 20, 2008 10:07 AM

Cup o' coffee? Big cup or small cup?

Posted by: Don Brouhaha at October 20, 2008 10:41 AM

The only correlation between breasts and coffee is the size of the CUP!

DUH!

DOH!

As for the screenings at Melbourne's airport, the terrorists are already plotting the next attack using body-piercing hardware and "BIN Wah balls" I mean "BEN Wah Balls."

Lose the hardware folks, thanks to those perfidious Islamic radicals.

Posted by: vet66 at October 20, 2008 10:50 AM

"Any thoughts on Politico.com's top story today about Michelle Obama establishing military families as her special cause and the primary focus of her tenure as First Lady if Obama wins?"

I have a thought or three.....but I already lower the (cough) *family* (cough cough) rating of this place enough as it is.
0>;~}

Posted by: DL Sly at October 20, 2008 11:17 AM

Damn. Sounds like I need to start drinking more coffee. My one question...does decaf work, too, or only regular caffeinated coffee? Caffeine makes me twitchy.

Posted by: Emily at October 20, 2008 12:00 PM

How many cups reduce cup size?

Not just Dolly Parton. Pamela Anderson, although hers are fake.

Posted by: Cricket at October 20, 2008 12:14 PM

I prefer tea ;~P

Posted by: HomefrontSix at October 20, 2008 01:17 PM

The best part of waking up is finding you're a B cup...

There, Sly. Don't feel bad.

Posted by: Cricket at October 20, 2008 02:01 PM

That was just wrong, Missy :p

Posted by: Cass at October 20, 2008 02:29 PM

I am feeling very froggy. I has a question: I am going to be doing a research paper on ONE of four topics. I have tentatively chosen the role of government (it is for an ethics and social responsibility class, and I get only eight pages), and you have had some excellent posts in that regard. I would like to quote YOU and of course give credit to you. I am going to be searching through your archives for the needed material, and let you know which ones I would like to quote from.

Even the comments have been good in those posts, so...uh, what say the blog princess and the assembled knavery? If the answer is 'drop dead, no way,' no prob.

heh.

Posted by: Cricket at October 20, 2008 03:50 PM

As I am unethical and socially irresponsible, I have no stake in the magnum opus whatsoever.

That said, go for it.

Just don't quote me...

Posted by: BillT at October 20, 2008 04:23 PM

Cricket dear, you may have trouble finding anything serious that I have said :p

That said, you are welcome. If you have a particular subject in mind and want me to search one of the old posts I have taken down I can do that too. There is a lot of more serious stuff I excerpted when I actually used to write decent things.

Posted by: Cass at October 20, 2008 04:26 PM

Coffee reduces breast size? That's either entirely made up, or I'm one of the outliers. I drink a lot of coffee. And I keep Industrial Strength Sports Bras R Us in business.

Posted by: April at October 20, 2008 04:45 PM

If my lady must choose between more awake and more ample, I'll take more awake.

Posted by: Hummer at October 20, 2008 04:56 PM

I do not really know what to make of that either, April.

When I was a young lass I was think, I did not drink coffee at all and I was... well, let's just say I was an A cup at best. In my middle years of being a housewife I struggled with the usual 5 or 10 pounds and I drank coffee and I don't think I was much bigger.

Now I weigh the same as I did when I when I was dating my husband, I'm still small busted by any standard you care to name, but I'm more of a small B cup and I drink coffee like a fiend from hell. Go figure - I sure can't figure it out.

Personally, I think alcohol makes your boobs bigger but that's just my theory. Or maybe it just makes the guy you're with *think* they're bigger (and that you're prettier too, which at my age is a definite advantage - and why I keep my husband well supplied with beer). At this rate I'll be a supermodel by 2010.

Posted by: Cass at October 20, 2008 04:59 PM

I was thinking about your more recent work on the bail out and the oil vote. I wanted to highlight that because of the role of government and your use of statistics and its connections with the seats and the ethos of the people involved and how they voted in regard to the bailout. I found that interesting and wanted to point that out as a situational ethic.
hehhehehehehe.

The oil vote was another aspect.

BTW, Lynne Westmoreland didn't vote for either bill...and sent me a long lovely letter about his reasons why. Do I need permission to use the writer's letter to me?

Posted by: Cricket at October 20, 2008 06:39 PM

Wait a minute. Isn't blurring the faces during the airport security scan kind of defeating the purpose. Or is there an entire bank of Super Computers out there with a private parts jpeg database? Curiouser and curiouser.

Posted by: george at October 20, 2008 07:09 PM

Now I weigh the same as I did when I when I was dating my husband, I'm still small busted by any standard you care to name, but I'm more of a small B cup and I drink coffee like a fiend from hell. Go figure - I sure can't figure it out.

What does coffee do? It stimulates your cardiovascular system and it increases the rate at which your muscles metabolize oxygen or carbs (not sure which). This increase the endurance of people doing work outs.

Now would this decrease the body fat percentage of women and thus their breast size? It would always be beneficiary if these people actually isolated the cause, the direct cause, and didn't just do some "correlations" in statistics.

Posted by: Ymarsakar at October 20, 2008 10:24 PM

I've only started drinking coffee in the last two years and by man-boobs are definitely getting bigger.

Not sure of the cup size tho...

Posted by: yak at October 20, 2008 10:54 PM

Now would this decrease the body fat percentage of women and thus their breast size? It would always be beneficiary if these people actually isolated the cause, the direct cause, and didn't just do some "correlations" in statistics.

Well, in fairness, they do. It just takes time, and the process is helped by the sharing of the early data. The way it starts is that you say, "Hey, here's something interesting." And you see where that goes in future studies and experiments.

So, in ten years, we may know exactly why. Today, all we know is that there's this correlation. But now you know it, and I know it, and if we happened to be chemists or biologists, that might trip a switch in our brains based on something we've been looking at elsewhere.

I understand the irritation with these endless medical "studies" that seem always to contradict each other, or be inconclusive; but there really is a lot of good coming out of this stuff.

BTW, I love reading the reactions of the ladies here. I can't help but imagine if this study had suggested that drinking coffee would reduce the size of masculine sexual attributes instead. You'd expect mens' comments to run the other way, and yet I can't imagine any man making a better comment than Emily's:

"Sounds like I need to start drinking more coffee!"

Posted by: Grim at October 20, 2008 11:15 PM

Boobies.

I haven't commented here for a long time. And now I'm commenting on a "boobies" post. Okay, I'm pathetic.

I'm male. Pathetic is easy.

When I travel around the world, I find anecdotal evidence that would tend to argue against the findings of this "study". But, I suppose, that is what "peer review" is purposed. Fer instance, the Russian woman. By far, the best legs in the world, and yet, even allowing for coffee ingestion, noted by the dearth of boobie development.

Is this a bad thing?

Let God sort it out.
.

Posted by: OregonGuy at October 20, 2008 11:25 PM

I'm still small busted by any standard you care to name

Not necessarily. It depends on which photo you're looking at...

Posted by: BillT at October 21, 2008 12:16 AM

BillT, you cartin' that thing around still?
Good grief, no wonder you have a rough time getting airborne.

Wonder what coffee does for 27" zippers...

Oh. I don't drink the stuff but oh my word. I go past the coffee aisle and INHALE. LOVE THE SMELL.

Posted by: Naughty Cricket at October 21, 2008 12:57 AM

Oh, if only I'd known... I would've drank more than about half a dozen cups of coffee in my life. :P

Posted by: FbL at October 21, 2008 01:30 AM

I understand the irritation with these endless medical "studies" that seem always to contradict each other, or be inconclusive; but there really is a lot of good coming out of this stuff.

I do recognize that most studies are dirt and only some are nuggets of diamond and that this necessarily means that you won't know the diamonds from the coal until much later.

But most of my irritation are for the studies that show beer makes women more attractive to men on a proportional scale.

You'd expect mens' comments to run the other way, and yet I can't imagine any man making a better comment than Emily's:

I suppose that means "never underestimate backpain".

Posted by: Ymarsakar at October 21, 2008 01:41 AM

Oh, if only I'd known...

There isn't that much coffee in *Brazil*...

Wonder what coffee does for 27" zippers...

Not much, until it starts to dry. The uneven shrink rates raise hob with it...

Posted by: BillT at October 21, 2008 01:50 AM

Maybe there is a connection between photoshop and boob size, Bill :p

Posted by: Cass at October 21, 2008 05:17 AM

Oregon Guy:

Fortunately for us women men have different tastes. My husband, for instance, was always more of a leg man :p

Posted by: Cass at October 21, 2008 05:20 AM

Maybe there is a connection between photoshop and boob size, Bill

Or the size of the boobs who use it.

A certain scrap metal collector comes to mind...

Posted by: BillT at October 21, 2008 06:17 AM

Fortunately for us women men have different tastes.

*chewing knuckle*

Posted by: BillT at October 21, 2008 06:19 AM

*grin*

Posted by: Cass at October 21, 2008 06:31 AM

Yanno Bill, there are few folks the blog princess can reliably count on to be right down there in the gutter with her...

*snort*

Posted by: Cass at October 21, 2008 06:33 AM

Feed me a straight line and I'll follow you anywhere.

At a reasonable distance. Say, just beyond trivet-hurling range...

Posted by: BillT at October 21, 2008 07:39 AM

> Is nothing sacred?

Why, yes, as a matter of fact.

Posted by: Obloodyhell at October 22, 2008 05:05 PM

> I have no stake in the magnum opus whatsoever.

Berke Breathead is doing a comic strip about Tom Sellick?

Posted by: Obloodyhell at October 22, 2008 05:07 PM

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