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March 05, 2009

S.O.S.

If any of the miscreants who frequent this blog know how to silence a snarky container of Breyer's Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream, the Editorial Staff would be extremely grateful.

In our opinion, comestibles should have the good sense not to speak unless they are spoken to.

Posted by Cassandra at March 5, 2009 08:09 AM

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Comments

Leave it out to melt, make a milkshake from it or threaten to have others eat it. Or let the dog clean out the container.

Posted by: Cricket at March 5, 2009 08:35 AM

It's the Unit's, so I am shunning it. However, I think it's extremely rude the way it sits in my freezer compartment and whispers sweet nothings to my derriere while I am trying to work.

Posted by: Cassandra at March 5, 2009 09:03 AM

I was going to suggest you place the offender in a styrofoam pack filled with dry ice and rendition it to a certain airfield in northern Iraq, but if it's the Unit's, I'd just wrap it in brown paper and tuck it under the family-sized bag of broccoli tufts until he forgets he bought it...

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 09:10 AM

I was going to suggest you place the offender in a styrofoam pack filled with dry ice and rendition it to a certain airfield in northern Iraq...

Heh :)

If I thought it would survive the trip, it'd be in the mail in a heartbeat. Can you gag ice cream?

Posted by: Cassandra at March 5, 2009 09:16 AM

Thot this *was* an ice cream gag...

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 09:55 AM

You put it behind a half gallon of Blue Bell Mint Chocolate Chip. You won't even hear the Breyer's. Believe me.

Posted by: MathMom at March 5, 2009 10:14 AM

MathMom ... [cue sickly sweet Southern accent]

Ah haaaaaate yew... :)

Posted by: Cassandra at March 5, 2009 10:27 AM

Ignore the siren song from the freezer and listen to the irritating predictor of future cellulite zones and their impact on skimpy summer thongs and exposed skin.

There, that should do it!

Posted by: vet66 at March 5, 2009 10:44 AM

If you run then you'll have a head start and you won't have to worry about those silly Breyers cravings. I like Baskin Robbins Mint Chocolate chip the best :-) nom nom nom. Derrier be damned!

Posted by: Red AppleClover at March 5, 2009 10:47 AM

Ignore the siren song from the freezer and listen to the irritating predictor of future cellulite zones and their impact on skimpy summer thongs and exposed skin.

That's precisely why I'm trying to ignore it! I want to be able to get into my shorts in a month or two.

Posted by: Cassandra at March 5, 2009 10:49 AM

When it comes to ice cream, you should follow this kid's advice.
0>;~}

Posted by: DL Sly at March 5, 2009 11:09 AM

"It is not the spoon that bent, it is only yourself."

"I want to be able to get into my shorts in a month or two."

Soooooo mnay possibilities, sooooooo little bandwidth.

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 12:13 PM

You are *so* cruising...

Posted by: Cass's Derriere at March 5, 2009 12:15 PM

*mnay* is just one of many possibilities.

Including *yman*, *amny*, and *%$#@! twitchy "Post" thumb*...

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 12:15 PM

Not gonna touch this one...
Naahgonnadewit.
Wouldn't be prudent.


Posted by: bthun at March 5, 2009 12:20 PM

You are *so* cruising...

But you forgot about the dulcet whisperings of the mint chocolate chip for a second, didn'tcha...

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 12:21 PM

Just go look at the picture of your butt I just linked to and you'll go deaf.

8^ )

Posted by: Eau de Locker Room at March 5, 2009 12:32 PM

That link would be available right cheer.

Posted by: John of Argghhh! at March 5, 2009 12:36 PM

Dead man.

Soooooo dead. I hope SWWBO has a good insurance policy :p

Posted by: Cass's Derriere at March 5, 2009 12:36 PM

No, she doesn't. Which is *my* insurance policy.

I've a good one on her, however.

Which is *also* my insurance policy.

Posted by: Malevolent Scalawag at March 5, 2009 12:39 PM

Tag-teaming through the blogwall!

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 12:56 PM

Just eat the damned thing and be done with it. Think of it as a home front sacrifice. ;-)

Posted by: Deb at March 5, 2009 01:20 PM

It's not her front she's worried about.

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 01:54 PM

"Just eat the damned thing and be done with it."

No, no, no. It's not her's.....so, she should only eat half.
0>;~}

Posted by: DL Sly at March 5, 2009 02:39 PM

Good point, Sly. Someone needs to stick up for the Big Unit around here.

Posted by: John "Danger is my cognomen" Donovan at March 5, 2009 02:58 PM

Twenty minutes from now, she's gonna confess that she scarfed it while the debate was going on.

Note that it's been almost three hours since her last appearance.

Plenty of time to have nipped down to the local Munchie-Mart for chocolate syrup, whipped cream, a jar of maraschino cherries...

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 03:19 PM

Hey! Somebody go check the Jungle Room at the Castle! She and Werekitty are prolly pole-dancing and knocking back milkshakes!

Posted by: John "Danger is my cognomen" Donovan at March 5, 2009 03:21 PM

"Note that it's been almost three hours since her last appearance."
With the siren-song imagery, "the dulcet whisperings of the mint chocolate chip", I figured M'lady had lashed herself to the mast of the treadmill. So I scarfed down a Klondike Heath Bar in sympathy whilst waiting for Mickey's hands to hit the Beer-thirty marks.

Posted by: bthun at March 5, 2009 03:37 PM

A *Heath* Bar? Your contract specifies vanilla!

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 03:40 PM

"A *Heath* Bar? Your contract specifies vanilla!"
I know, but every now and again, I like to hang by the trash cans, dry fire my firearms, eat Klondike bars, swill beer, shoot the breeze with the neighbors, like Boomhauer the 60 year old biker, and Gomez Addams.

Yup, live dangerously. -Have Exoskeleton Will Travel- that's my motto... =8^}

Oh wait! Wrong thread.

Posted by: Hun... bt -- hun at March 5, 2009 03:59 PM

And *why*, pithee tell, do you not become this verbose at the Castle comment parties?

Oh, wait. It's the subject matter -- John's not worried about what he looks like in shorts.

*Anything* to scare the coyotes away from the chicken barracks...

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 04:34 PM

Plenty of time to have nipped down to the local Munchie-Mart for chocolate syrup, whipped cream, a jar of maraschino cherries...

That's not what I use whipped cream for.

*rimshot*

Posted by: Cass's Derriere at March 5, 2009 04:47 PM

"And *why*, pithee tell, do you not become this verbose at the Castle comment parties?"
I'm not sure if you're asking me, but if you are.

Ahhhhhh, yeah, there is a good reason I enjoy reading and commenting upon M'lady's thoughts. I'd bet that most of us here might agree on that reason.

Regarding the shorts, M'lady's, not John's -- not that there's anything wrong with that cause, I too, enjoy plinking varmints with my good old Remington 597 off the back deck, on a summer's evening, whilst casually attired. Admittedly, the subject of M'lady's shorts didn't hamper the motivation or the conceptual continuity either. I blame Vet66 for bringing it up in the first place!

I guess it's that male imagination thing. =8^}

*ducks back down into trench and resumes working with the trenchin' tool*

Posted by: bthun at March 5, 2009 05:23 PM

Share it with the Unit. Naked.

Posted by: Cricket at March 5, 2009 05:32 PM

Knew it. It was only a matter of time.

Sex and relationships -- again.

Posted by: BillT at March 5, 2009 05:52 PM

Heh, not really... It does not take much to fire my imagination.

A shapely little thing in red is more than sufficient.

Posted by: bthun at March 5, 2009 06:04 PM

That - no, not the Porsche, the other link - was lovely, bthun.

Thank you :)

Posted by: Cassandra at March 5, 2009 06:15 PM

Cass...did your derriere just make a *rim shot*?

Good God, Almighty.


I'm with Bill on this one - NOT partaking of the "mnay" possibilities.

Posted by: Sly's Wardrobe Mistress at March 5, 2009 09:20 PM

Sex and relationships...isn't that what 'sharing' is all about? From each, according to their needs?

Why am I so crabby? I have been challenged to find the fallacy in all things uttered.

No. Really. Take a look at my text. It rags on Rush Limbaugh as the king of phallacious utterances.

Of course, it gave the Evil Chimp some latitude for changing his mind using Rush's logic, therefore absolving Senator ForAgainst Kerry.

What class am I taking now? Logic.

I kid you not.

Posted by: Cricket at March 5, 2009 10:37 PM

I know I'm late to the party....

Better than the Breyer's Mint Chocolate Chip, IMO, is Blue Bell's Chocolate Almond Marshmallow....

Lucky for me, it isn't always available in the local grocery store. I need to remember: nothing tastes so good as being thin feels. I've still got a long way to go!

Posted by: Miss Ladybug at March 5, 2009 10:39 PM

Cass...did your derriere ...

I accept no responsibility for anything my derriere may have said. I may at times incline to the odd double entendre, but that one went right over my ...

Nope. *Not* going there.
Wouldn't be prudent.

Posted by: Cassandra at March 5, 2009 10:41 PM

Keep it up, Miss Ladybug!

That's why I'm staying away from the ice cream.

Posted by: Cassandra at March 5, 2009 10:41 PM

Might not be prudent but sure would be damn funny.

Posted by: Sly's Wardrobe Mistress at March 6, 2009 12:34 AM

That's not what I use whipped cream for.

Beats topping the ice cream with egg salad...

Posted by: BillT at March 6, 2009 07:41 AM

"That's not what I use whipped cream for.

Beats topping the ice cream with egg salad..."

*grabs defibrillator again*
ZZZZZZzzzzt
ZZZZZZt
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Posted by: bt_call-a-medic!_hun at March 6, 2009 08:19 AM

That's not what I use whipped cream for.

Beats topping the ice cream with egg salad...

No, no, no....think "cargo straps and ball gag"!

Posted by: Sly's Wardrobe Mistress at March 6, 2009 12:17 PM

.

> You put it behind a half gallon of Blue Bell Mint Chocolate Chip. You won't even hear the Breyer's. Believe me.

Damn straight.

Word from your MathMother...

.

Posted by: Obloodyhell at March 6, 2009 03:56 PM

No, no, no....think "cargo straps and ball gag"!

*turning right around and going for the fifth cold shower in a row*

Posted by: BillT at March 7, 2009 05:17 AM

Only at VC :p

PS: whipped cream comes in chocolate now. Heavenly.

Posted by: Cassandra at March 7, 2009 10:01 AM

*turning right around for number six*

Posted by: BillT at March 7, 2009 11:21 AM

Careful, you'll run out of cold water...

Posted by: HomefrontSix at March 7, 2009 01:32 PM

"PS: whipped cream comes in chocolate now. Heavenly. "
ZZZZZZzzzzt
ZZZZZZt
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

<Groan> Wheeze, cough, cough, wheeze</Groan>

Posted by: bt_just-a-resistive-electrical-load_hun at March 7, 2009 03:58 PM

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*snort snort*

Lots to think about on my drive to Ft. Sam this afternoon....hahahahahahahahaha

Thank you all!

And I will stop at What A Burger AND Baskin Robbins (3 scooops of Rocky Road on a sugar cone, sil vous plaint, ma cherie!).

I love driving my brides' FX35; I wish I had a satisfactory radar jammer, 'casue that pup will do an easy 135....in 6th gear....still got one to go. (I tried it between Phoenix and Yuma on I10).

CW4

Posted by: CW4 at March 8, 2009 12:13 PM

"I tried it between Phoenix and Yuma on I10."

Given the average drive time of about 2 and half hours....how much time did you shave off?

Posted by: DL Sly at March 8, 2009 01:20 PM

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