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April 09, 2009

Lame Blogging Alert

On behalf of the Editorial Staff, we wish to apologize for the lame blogfare from you-know-who.

It's not easy driving 80 mph, talking on the phone, and applying mascara all at the same time, but we imagine this is why the Powers That Be gave the blog princess knees.

Be patient with her. Lord knows we are.

Sincerely,

Half Vast Staff of Itinerant Eskimo Typists

Posted by Cassandra at April 9, 2009 11:58 AM

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Comments

Well, we'll let it pass as long as the mascara is on straight and you don't poke yourself in the eye...

Posted by: vet66 at April 9, 2009 01:15 PM

...we imagine this is why the Powers That Be gave the blog princess knees.

Those of us with more florid imaginations believe it was so the Powers That Be would insure we go weak in *ours*.

Ma'am.

Posted by: BillT7th Earl of Knitted Waistcoats at April 9, 2009 02:15 PM

And here I figured I was setting myself up for a pile of "women drivers" jokes...

Posted by: Cassandra at April 9, 2009 02:33 PM

Not with knees like those, you won't.

Hubba-hubba, 23-skiddoo, 'n' stuff...

Posted by: BillT at April 9, 2009 02:42 PM

All the more reason for the cadre of VC Irregulars to step up and clog the blog with random acts of nonsense, mis-spelleings and preposterous non-sequiturs.

For example: Question: Where you get that tie?Answer: I wasn't looking. Honest.

Question: How many bed bugs does it take before a Bed Bug Commission needs to be appointed to count them? Answer: We'll get back to you in thirty-five years or so after we've finished counting them. It could be longer.

Question: After swimming over five miles in the ocean and surviving on a deserted island for four months on a unsteady diet of wild goats, would you:
(a) Wag at the hand that didn't feed you
(b) Sleep and snore until their guard was down, and then rip their throats out; or
(c) Get a commemorative tattoo and then pee on the rug?

Watch out for that mascara.
You could put your eye out.

Posted by: spd rdr at April 9, 2009 02:54 PM

Nothing beats comedy quite like missing your marks.

Posted by: spd rdr at April 9, 2009 02:58 PM

All fixed :)

Posted by: Cassandra at April 9, 2009 03:07 PM

Question: why does

Question: After swimming over five miles in the ocean and surviving on a deserted island for four months on a unsteady diet of wild goats, would you:

generate a link box reading

Related Searches

* "nude beach" search results
* "North Carolina" search results
* "cattle dog" search results

?

Posted by: BillT at April 9, 2009 03:30 PM

That's the beauty of capitalism. Bill. No error ever goes unrewarded.

Posted by: spd rdr at April 9, 2009 03:36 PM

Maybe it's just me, but I find the juxtaposition of "nude beach" and "wild goats" profoundly disturbing.

But not as disturbing as this

Posted by: Cassandra at April 9, 2009 03:59 PM

"Maybe it's just me, but I find the juxtaposition of "nude beach" and "wild goats" profoundly disturbing."
Ewe got that right! Dithguthteng, thimply dithguthting.

Hey! Wanna thee my earmark?

Posted by: Bwany Fwank at April 9, 2009 04:33 PM

Hey! Wanna thee my earmark?

Another sign of the urgent need for federal intervention in the every day lives of ordinary American citizens....

WE NEED PROTECTION, DADGUMIT!!!!

Posted by: Sister Mary-Margaret from Our Lady of Unregulated Derivatives at April 9, 2009 04:40 PM

Maybe it's just me, but I find the juxtaposition of "nude beach" and "wild goats" profoundly disturbing.

Maybe it's just me, but I find the juxtaposition of "nude beach" and "wild goats" profoundly hilarious.

Posted by: BillT at April 9, 2009 04:50 PM

So that's what it is.

BillT, I do too.

Posted by: Cricket at April 9, 2009 04:53 PM

HOLY SMOKES! I BOUGHT GIRL SCOUT COOKIES FROM HER!!!!

*Sigh* ANOTHER Eleven hundred boxes of thin mints down the disposal.

Posted by: spd rdr at April 9, 2009 04:54 PM

I *knew* it wouldn't take long for this to degenerate into another example of

WE NEED PROTECTION, DADGUMIT!!!!

sex and

I find the juxtaposition of "nude beach" and "wild goats" profoundly disturbing."

relationships.

Posted by: BillT at April 9, 2009 04:54 PM

Note to self: *never* leave doors open around Bill.

Posted by: Sister Mary-Margaret from Our Lady of Unregulated Derivatives at April 9, 2009 04:59 PM

So then you admit to the wild, wild, goat thing on nude beaches with girl scouts covered in thin mints, don't you Senator Stevens?

AH HA! We thought so!

Posted by: spd rdr at April 9, 2009 05:03 PM

HOLY SMOKES! I BOUGHT GIRL SCOUT COOKIES FROM HER!!!!

The Girl Scouts in Virginia must be more precocious than those in other states...

Posted by: Sister Mary-Margaret from Our Lady of Unregulated Derivatives at April 9, 2009 05:24 PM

"I find the juxtaposition of "nude beach" and "wild goats" profoundly hilarious."
I pail to see de humor in such a serious part of de man-goat-recreation dynamic...

Matter of phact just to sho ewe de softer side of sharia, and how we all have de soft spot in our hearts for our livestock, particularly when we take our goats on bacation to de nude beach, ewe owe it to yourselph to watch dis touching bideo...

And no, I did not make any campaign contributions to Senator Stevens... Obama yes, Stevens no.

Posted by: El Suliman Mahmoud Al-HiltonHead RalphsenJohnny at April 9, 2009 05:26 PM

Do you see, Princess, what happens when you hand falls from the throttle? Chaos and girl scout cookies! (Which is undoubtably cool under certain controlled conditions in Europe.)

Posted by: spd rdr at April 9, 2009 06:12 PM

The Girl Scouts in Virginia must be more precocious than those in other states...

Well, considering that most of them don't drop out of high school until they're at least 27...

Posted by: BillT at April 9, 2009 06:42 PM

"Chaos and girl scout cookies! (Which is undoubtably cool under certain controlled conditions in Europe.)"
Hmmmm, Ya think?

Posted by: Roman Polanski at April 9, 2009 06:54 PM

Roman ~ he said "girl scout COOKIES". Down, boy.

Posted by: HomefrontSix at April 9, 2009 06:59 PM

Note to self: *never* leave doors open around Bill.

Have you ever known *that* to stop me?

Posted by: BillT at April 9, 2009 07:04 PM

*grin*

Posted by: Cassandra at April 9, 2009 11:01 PM

At least they claim you are driving with your kneees and not your thighs? There is some good news there. :)

Posted by: Tom at April 10, 2009 12:35 AM

Sometimes referred to as "red coats," or "chinches," Democrats are blood-feeding parasites of productive humans, chickens, bats and occasionally domesticated animals. Democrats are wingless and spread from infested to non-infested areas through the transportation of sin, vice, class envy, and bedding. In the early stages of infestation, Democrats are found mainly at colleges and universities, Marxist book clubs, coffee and bath houses, vegan restaurants, and the seems and folds of the mattress and bed covers. However, they later spread to cracks and crevices in the bedsteads.

Posted by: Hummer at April 10, 2009 08:07 AM

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