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October 28, 2009

10 Reasons to Join the Marine Team

1. Marines have the best uniforms, hands down. And as everyone knows, chicks really dig a guy in uniform.

2. Marines know how to fight. That's why they're called America's 911 force:

In the true spirit of "jointness" I offer the following as "Everything you need to know about differences in service culture. All in good fun, of course.

US Marine Corps Rules for Gunfighting

1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a "4."
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.

Navy SEAL Rules For Gunfighting

1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Return quickly to looking cool in latest beach wear.
4. Check hair in mirror.

US Army Ranger Rules For Gunfighting

1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound pack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from "Higher" to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.

Army Rules for Gunfighting

1. Select a new beret to wear.
2. Sew combat patch on right shoulder.
3. Change the color of beret you decide to wear.

US Air Force Rules For Gunfighting

1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what's on HBO.
4. Determine "what is a gunfight."
5. Request more funding from Congress with a "killer" PowerPoint presentation.
6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets "strategic" and never deploy them operationally.
9. Tell the Navy to send the Marines.

US Navy Rules For Gunfighting

1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee.
3. Watch porn.
4. Send the Marines.


3. Being the smallest of the services forces us to be creative. Marines fight smarter, not harder. Jim Mattis wasn't kidding when he said the Marine style is a blend of chivalry and ferocity: no better friend, no worse enemy.

4. The Marine Corps Silent Drill Team. Poetry in motion:

5. Tradition: we still celebrate ours. Mess nites, dinings in and out, St. Barbara's day and the Marine Corps Ball: no one celebrates their rich history with more flair and elan than the Marine Corps. We still dress for dinner, we still pull out cigars and the smoking lamp for the men (and sometimes the ladies!).

We still light candles in memory of fallen comrades and those who have been wounded in the service of this nation. We do not forget. If you've ever been invited to a Marine Ball, don't pass up the opportunity to attend. Those of us who have passed the quarter century mark may roll our eyes a bit, but we still go every year and still tear up when the same old passages are read. What began on November 10, 1775 in Tun Tavern is still remembered in giant ballrooms, decorated hangars, and dingy conference rooms all over this planet. Marines gather as one family to celebrate that which unites and binds us: a love of Corps, country, and above all, each other.

6. Esprit de corps: Which, as you should know, is no cheese-eating surrender monkey Phrench-sounding label, but something each Marine takes to heart on the day he or she finally earns the right to be called "Marine". Every Marine is a rifleman. To call the average Marine a soldier, troop, sailor, or airman to is risk a speedy and ungentle correction. There are only Marines, an appellation which (unlike soldiers, sailors, or airmen) is always capitalized. Now *that's* respect.)

7. Toughest mascot. Think about it:

Army: a mule
Air Force: a stinkin' bird?
Navy: ummm... a goat
Marines: a bulldog. Nuff said.

8. Marine PT. Did the HVES mention that we're just better-looking?

9. Marine wives. There is an old Spanish saying, "No hay rosas sin espinas." I think it fits Marine wives well: tough, but tender; beautiful but enduring. On the day my husband finally leaves the Corps, my most precious memories will be of the officer and enlisted wives I have been privileged to work with, laugh with, cry with, and share this wacky thrill ride that is military life.

10. The Navy-Marine Corps team: as much as we love to rib the Navy, we couldn't do our job without them. On any Marine base, along with green you'll see Navy khaki. Navy corpsmen go to battle with us and dress our wounds. They are at once healers, life savers, and soldiers as tough and brave as any Marine. Navy chaplains pray with us and bury our dead. They weep with us and help us to try and make sense of the incomprehensible.

And it is Navy ships which carry us to distant shores so we can do what we do best: respond as America's 9/11 force. They provide devastating firepower on target when we need it. We are proud to be a part of the sea service. But that said....until November 11th...

Beat Navy!

As the smallest service, what we need to do to win is spread the word far and wide. So please, email your favorite bloggers and ask them: "Why aren't you on the Marine team"?

We're still looking for a few good bloggers. It's a good cause.

Posted by Cassandra at October 28, 2009 08:54 PM

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The Title
It Can Not be Inherited
Nor Can it Ever be Purchased
You or No One Alive
can Buy It for Any Price
It is Impossible to Rent
and It Can Not be Lent
You Alone and Our Own
have Earned It
with Your Sweat, Blood and Lives.
You Own It Forever
The Title
"United States Marine"

In Honor of Our Fallen
and Disabled Brothers

George L. Scott, Jr

Semper Fi.

RVN 66-67
1st Bn. 9th marines

Posted by: Mark at October 28, 2009 09:44 PM

God bless you, sir.

And thank you.

Posted by: Cassandra at October 28, 2009 09:47 PM

Re uniforms: The Army dress is the best!! But they hardly ever wear them.

Posted by: philip at October 29, 2009 02:41 AM

Phillip, as a proud soldier myself... I still gotta disagree with you. Mind you, I was in the era of the green business suit, though I DID get married in my Dress Blues, even they were a pale comparison to the USMC Dress Blues.

We had a militarized version of a business suit. They got a military uniform. There's no comparison between the two. And painful though it is to admit, I always was jealous of that.

Posted by: MikeD at October 29, 2009 11:39 AM

I am with Mike D. on uniforms....mostly. No mistaking a Marine in any of their uniforms (although that hideous thing they did to sailors will mix that up!!!)

I am a currently serving Army Officier who recently wore my blues as the "new" Class A uniform and no one knew who I was, or what I was. And when I was in the Navy, in whites or blues, they knew I was a sailor (or a chief, later.)

So now we are down to ACU's (jammie sleepers) and dress blues, while the Marines have appropriate uniforms for every occasion.....and you know they are a Marine!

Semper Fi. I would go to the ball again. Went as a CPO with a Marine "friend" and had a great time, in spite of being referred to as the transportation branch of the Marines....

Posted by: Kbob in Katy at October 29, 2009 08:41 PM

Kbob, I was out before the beret switch and the new "Class A's". How are those new blues?

Posted by: MikeD at October 30, 2009 09:04 AM

semper fi all you Marines reading this! Many thanks to the navy too!! I lost a great Corpsman who fought beside me, RIP. But, i do have to say yes, the Marine Corps is a department of the Navy... The MENS department!!! OORAH!

Posted by: dvl dog at August 23, 2010 09:39 PM