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October 22, 2009

Well Dayum....

... that settles it:


Rock bands including Pearl Jam and REM have joined a coalition of musicians to support the US president's efforts to close the Guantanamo Bay prison.

The National Campaign to Close Guantanamo, which also includes former military officers, launched on Tuesday.

Many of the artists who have signed up are angry that their music was used as an interrogation tool in the jail.

Amateurs... what do these people know of torture?

JACKIE KLEIN is a devoted mother of two little boys in the suburbs of Portland, Ore. She spends hours ferrying them to soccer and Cub Scouts. She reads child-development books. She can emulate one of those pitch-perfect calm maternal tones to warn, “You’re making bad choices” when, say, someone doesn’t want to brush his teeth.

LOWERING THE BOOM Some frustrated parents resort to yelling and screaming followed by feelings of guilt.
That is 90 percent of the time. Then there is the other 10 percent, when, she admits, “I have become totally frustrated and lost control of myself.”

It can happen during weeks and weeks and weeks of no camp in the summer, or at the end of a long day at home — just as adult peace is within her grasp — when the 7- or 9-year-old won’t go to sleep.

And then she yells.

“This is ridiculous! I’ve been doing things all day for you!”

Many in today’s pregnancy-flaunting, soccer-cheering, organic-snack-proffering generation of parents would never spank their children. We congratulate our toddlers for blowing their nose (“Good job!”), we friend our teenagers (literally and virtually), we spend hours teaching our elementary-school offspring how to understand their feelings. But, incongruously and with regularity, this is a generation that yells.

“I’ve worked with thousands of parents and I can tell you, without question, that screaming is the new spanking,” said Amy McCready, the founder of Positive Parenting Solutions, which teaches parenting skills in classes, individual coaching sessions and an online course. “This is so the issue right now. As parents understand that it’s not socially acceptable to spank children, they are at a loss for what they can do. They resort to reminding, nagging, timeout, counting 1-2-3 and quickly realize that those strategies don’t work to change behavior. In the absence of tools that really work, they feel frustrated and angry and raise their voice. They feel guilty afterward, and the whole cycle begins again.”

Why don't you just go ahead and spank your child, lady. Or better yet, have Michael Stipe spank him.

Posted by Cassandra at October 22, 2009 05:02 PM

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Many of the artists who have signed up are angry that their music was used as an interrogation tool in the jail.

The Baltimore Bagpipe Band was unavailable for comment.

Posted by: BillT at October 22, 2009 05:54 PM

Well, we started this week with slutty Halloween costumes, then segued to the Catholic/Anglican rift and now we've moved on to spanking.....and the Unit's only been gone for a month.

Posted by: DL Sly at October 22, 2009 06:15 PM

Heh. I was talking about that spank/shout story today too. It's amazing to me that these people think that this is an improvement.

Posted by: Grim at October 22, 2009 06:20 PM

What fresh Hell is this?

I can tell you that corporal punishment is more effective with boys, and patient psychological punishment is more effective with girls, but screaming is just plain stupid. It tells the child that you have lost control of yourself.

And let's all hear it for the self-congratultory rock stars that are SO against the notion of Gitmo and all that icky punishment and confinement.
I guess if we just yell at these guys for few minutes that will fix it. Yeah.
A few minutes of sustained yelling at Khalid Sheik Mohammed will change his life. Forevah!!

Ha ha ha ha.....

Posted by: Don Brouhaha at October 22, 2009 08:06 PM

...corporal punishment is more effective with boys, and patient psychological punishment is more effective with girls...

Nonsense: spanking works wonders with girls. Admittedly, I've only tried it on girls over twenty... but the results speak for themselves!

Posted by: Grim at October 22, 2009 08:29 PM

Stipe really is a colossal asshat. I enjoy some of his music but I now fully understand why when I had my aptitudes tested they told me to keep music as a hobby rather than my profession.

Posted by: Cassandra at October 22, 2009 08:36 PM

Far as I can tell, different things work different on different kids.

And, from the tone of the "expert's" quotes, I'm guessing they're one of those idiots that labels anything beyond "Tommy, don't" as yelling.

I know that mom raising her voice worked REALLY well on me, my sister (a social butterfly) responded well to mom's form of time out, and my brother responded best to being swatted. (although we all got swatted at one point or another-- and you know what? It worked. As far back as I remember, we've been complimented for how polite and well behaved we are.)

Posted by: Foxfier at October 22, 2009 08:50 PM

The group Drowning Pool's song "Bodies" was a GTMO fave. They were ecstatic to hear it.

And I would challenge those "experts" who claim that spanking is always wrong and horribly harms a child to spend a month with my kids and all that entails - homeschooling, extra curricular activities, single parenting, dirty bedrooms, dirty bathrooms, clothes on the floor, stepping on legos, ad infinitum - and not spank in appropriate circumstances.

My kids would eat them alive. Seriously - it would be Lord of the Flies at the AF Family house and the visiting shrink would be the piggy.

On the other hand, when they're with me they behave.

Immediate consequences. They're a beautiful thing.

Posted by: airforcewife at October 22, 2009 10:02 PM

*They* were ecstatic = *Drowning Pool* was ecstatic.

Posted by: airforcewife at October 22, 2009 10:03 PM

I really liked Grim's suggestion on his site to use push-ups on boys as punishment. I have seen a soccer coach use it with great success on twelve 9 and 10 year old boys. I like the fact that it builds their strength as well as wearing them out.

Posted by: Russ at October 22, 2009 10:09 PM

Push-ups are a great punishment. Of course, my father was an Army drill sergeant, so...

Posted by: Grim at October 22, 2009 10:14 PM

Fear can be a great motivator in the behavior of some people, like those little obnoxious people we call "children". Mine, yours, the ones down the street throwing TP into the trees, and especially the older ones driving 55 mph down the street in Daddy's car with Pearl Jam on at 110 db.

Pain can induce fear, fear can cause momentary loss of obnoxiousness, hence the success in corporal punishment of some "small" children. It always helps to remind the other small males in my household who the actual Alpha Male is, from time to time. It doesn't always have to be "spanking". A good headlock followed by a brisk "Dutch rub" ("Dad, that hurts!") does wonders to affect a change in attitude, from being annoying and vulgar rudeness to their Mother to abject apology and a few minutes of polite behavior. We are all thankful for those few minutes of peace.

AFWife, I can tell you have actually raised a gaggle of kids. :D

Sometimes a firm grip on the arm and an escorted tour to the front room with "What do you think you're doing?" works well too.
Push -ups just make them laugh (however, push-up bras have their place), and then they start to try and one-up each other. However, once they are on the ground, sometimes you can step on their backsides and ask them how they like that sort of treatment?

Posted by: Don Brouhaha at October 22, 2009 10:40 PM

REM and PJ should reflect on the fact that their music was deemed appropriate for the specified task.

Just sayin'.

Posted by: bthun at October 22, 2009 11:04 PM

My brother and I were spanked, though we were never beaten/abused. I wasn't spanked much: I didn't want that to happen, so I did my best to try to avoid the behavior for which that might be a consequence. Not sure how much my sisters got spanked. My oldest sister was seven and my youngest sister wasn't even four when I left for college. But, I do know they got away with more than my brother and I ever did. I think my parents got a little lax in their older age with their second set of kids...

Posted by: Miss Ladybug at October 22, 2009 11:04 PM

Bthun, you raise a fine point.

Posted by: Grim at October 22, 2009 11:09 PM

I got spanked way more than my little brother :p That still wasn't a lot, though. Still, as an abused child I must stand in solidarity with the victims of parental oppression.

No Justice, no Peace. Fight the Power!

Posted by: Cassandra at October 22, 2009 11:09 PM

Bring it on. Our anthem is A Boy Named Sue. We shall march on a road of bones!

Posted by: Grim at October 22, 2009 11:18 PM

My Mom had the incredible ability to reach behind her in the car and smack every occupant in the backseat whilst driving 100 mph down the freeway in her gold Cadillac without swerving, weaving or even breaking speed, (loooong before cruise control) and my Pop would make us go get our own switch - better get the 'right' one the first time, too, cause they *tested* it on your butt. They used to say that if they were raising kids today, that CPS would put them under the jail.
I have administered one spanking to the VES, and while it was only three open-handed swats, that was all it took. Which was what I intended.

Posted by: DL Sly at October 22, 2009 11:45 PM

"He" tested it on your butt. Not "they".

Posted by: DL Sly at October 22, 2009 11:48 PM

...it was only three open-handed swats, that was all it took.

Animals can't yell, but correct the babies *often* until they've learned to behave -- granted, they still behave like animals.

Watch mama critter correcting her young and she either gives a paw-whap or a nose-poke -- and never more than three. By then, the lesson's been learned and the transgression forgiven -- and the transgression won't be repeated. Three appears to be the magic number that clues the tad that mom is *really* torqued.

Posted by: BillT at October 23, 2009 03:25 AM

Just have Stipe visit your child. Then tell them that if he doesn't mind, Stipe will come back. He will mind or stay up nights sweating and having nightmares.

Posted by: man riding unicycle naked at October 23, 2009 10:28 AM

I can count on one hand -- and not need the thumb -- the number of times that I've had need to bring up that spanking to the VES. That's not to say that she hasn't pushed the boundaries, the knowledge of what lies on the other side should she cross is enough to keep her just *toein' the line*.

And the "Mother's Curse" is fulfilled.

Posted by: DL Sly at October 23, 2009 03:09 PM

The group Drowning Pool's song "Bodies" was a GTMO fave.

It would be -- it was the background tune to a vid which had a lot of action sequences of the type that give GFWs the vapors...

Posted by: BillT at October 23, 2009 03:49 PM