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February 02, 2012

Well *That* Certainly Settles It...

All of the “institutions” of civil moderation of sexual relationship – marriage, children, families – are founded on the male urge to have sexual relations with women. Men don’t screw women to marry them or have babies or families. They screw them because they are horny. Babies, families, and marriage are the price they have to pay in order to scratch that horniness.

- Bill Quick

Huh. And here I always thought the male of the species was considerably smarter than that.

How depressing to be so convincingly informed otherwise.

Posted by Cassandra at February 2, 2012 07:58 AM

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Comments

Finally: some long overdue recognition that *I* am driving the bus.

*blush*

Posted by: The Romantic Bone at February 2, 2012 09:15 AM

Wait, what? I'm a guy and I've been doing it wrong the whole time? So what do I do with a woman I love and want to build a life and raise children? Should I have not married her then? (This advice is really poorly timed as I'm now 12 years and 5 kids in.)

Posted by: JustMe at February 2, 2012 10:38 AM

Well, to a certain extent, he's right. There are (still) men who want to have sex with women. Those men are acutely aware that sex with women is not a costless activity - candy, flowers, dinners, jewelry, houses, tchotchkes, wallpaper, children - these are prospective costs that a prudent man would weigh before embarking on a physical relationship a woman. Fortunately for the species, most prudent men aren't interested in having sex with women because, well, they're married, and are carrying the "sunk costs" associated with their prior imprudence.

Where Mr. Quick goes astray is assuming that men so mind the costs involved with having sex with women that having "costless" "virtual sex" in a video game is a reasonable substitute. Uh... no. Men that like women generally prefer REAL women. Not only are real women soft and warm, they also smell good. Try getting THAT over the internet. Moreover, Mr. Quick uses sex between gay men as an example of how men will "substitute" costless sex for expensive sex with women. Really? But I was told that gay people were born that way.

Posted by: spd rdr - debtor to love at February 2, 2012 10:40 AM

Lord knows, I am no apt judge of why men do anything.

I do think it's interesting that I have two married sons and in both cases, my sons seemed to want children more than my daughters in law.

Which is not to say that neither of my daughters in law wanted (or want) kids. They do. It's just that their husbands seem to want children and a family even more.

These days, a young man does not need to marry to have his "itch scratched", as it were. So why do young men pop the question if they don't need to?

Posted by: Cassandra at February 2, 2012 11:01 AM

I would like to think that most men are more complicated than that.

Posted by: Bill Brandt at February 2, 2012 11:38 AM

There are (still) men who want to have sex with women. ...acutely aware that sex with women is not a costless activity - candy, flowers, dinners, jewelry, houses, tchotchkes, wallpaper, children - these are prospective costs....

Umm, no. Too many contaminants in this. My wife has always been a cheap date, as have I. Candy? No sweet tooth. Flowers? Really? Kill something to celebrate life and love? Live plants are no sub, either; she hates to grub in the dirt as much as I do. Jewelry is a waste of money, she says: show your love with deed, not baubles.

Our daughter isn't a cost center; she's a profit center.

I am no apt judge of why men do anything.

Here's the Truth: men and women don't do anything.

A woman is just an egg's way of getting another egg. A man is just the sperm's way of getting another sperm. And the sexual reproductive techniques we tools use simply combine the best practices of two evolutionarily successful individual procreation strategies: an egg, carefully nurtured against predators to adulthood to produce another, and a blast of sperm sprayed simply to out breed the predators and competition.

Eric Hines

Posted by: E Hines at February 2, 2012 11:51 AM

These days, a young man does not need to marry to have his "itch scratched", as it were. So why do young men pop the question if they don't need to?

Let's ask Frank:

That old black magic has me in its spell,
that old black magic that you weave so well.
Those icy fingers up and down my spine
That same old witchcraft when your eyes meet mine.
The same old tingle that I feel inside,
and then that elevator starts its ride
And down and down I go,
round and round I go,
like a leaf that's caught in the tide.
I should stay away, but what can I do?
I hear your name and I'm aflame
Aflame with such a burning desire
that only your kiss can put out the fire.
For you're the lover I have waited for,
the mate that fate had me created for.
And every time your lips meet mine, darling,
down and down I go,
round and round I go
In a spin,
loving the spin I'm in,
under that old black magic called love.

Posted by: spd rdr - debtor to love at February 2, 2012 11:57 AM

Old Blue Eyes strikes again :)

Posted by: The Romantic Bone at February 2, 2012 12:44 PM

Yeah, I'd prefer that this dude not presume to speak for me, much less my gender as a whole. He's a piss poor example of a man.

Posted by: MikeD at February 2, 2012 01:05 PM

Funny how often the guys who detest the institution of marriage so often marry and remarry and remarry. As easy as it is to get laid these days, there must be some other dark motive.

All I'm hearing is guys who have been hurt and disappointed in a perfectly natural desire to find intimacy, but think it would be weak to admit it, so they spout this kind of "Iron Man" nonsense as a camouflage.

Posted by: Texan99 at February 3, 2012 12:00 PM

Yanno what is even more depressing? That the male of the species will trick the female into marrying him because he professes his love, ability to provide and what a caring partner and father he will be. After 26 years, I am still waiting to see signs of boorish unconcern, lack of employment, and no caring re: spousal events and children's needs. The cad.

Posted by: Carolyn at February 5, 2012 10:08 PM

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