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November 03, 2013

You Had One Job

What can I say? Sometimes the pictures just speak for themselves. So, here for your viewing pleasure and snarky ridicule is "You Had One Job" supermarket edition:

Watermelon or corn.jpg

Fanta or Coke.jpg


Parking lot arrow.jpg

Posted by DL Sly at November 3, 2013 01:07 AM

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Close enough for govt work: The Obamacare website implementers bring their savvy to the private sector.

Posted by: a former european at November 3, 2013 10:11 AM

Nice to see you, AFE.

Posted by: DL Sly at November 3, 2013 03:17 PM

AFE wins this thread out of the gate

Posted by: CAPT Mike at November 4, 2013 12:05 AM

Well, we all know how he likes to make an entrance!

Posted by: DL Sly at November 4, 2013 12:21 AM

Love you too, guys and gals. You don't know how tempted I was to respond in full-blown Chirac Gaullism. I need to find a new frenchie snootmeister to become the centerpiece of my french mockery, though. Chirac is dated, and the new Lead Socialist over there is clownish, but too much of an empty suit. Pompous buffoonery is best, and Chirac was perfect as a french Mussolini.

Also, those damned credit card commercials with the dude named "Peggy" in a hut in Siberia have ripped off my Oleg from Novy Sverdlovsk shtick. I have been so busy keeping my company solvent in an Obama economy, that I haven't had time to come up with new material. I will have to get on that.

Cass: On another vein, I know that you are/were a military family. I have been hearing some disturbing info that The Maximum Leader is purging the military of officers who display insufficient socialistic ardor. Can you shed any light on this?

I understand that those of us who march in the vanguard of the Revolution must be ever-watchful for Kulaks and agents of the capitalistic, imperialistic exploiters of the Proletariat, who seek to deny the masses the joy which The New Soviet Red Dawn would bring under Most Beloved Leader Obama, but has the People's Army truly been so infested with counterrevolutionary thinking and other such thought crimes? Inquiring minds of elevated social consciousness want to know.

Posted by: a former european at November 4, 2013 07:07 PM

Cass: On another vein, I know that you are/were a military family. I have been hearing some disturbing info that The Maximum Leader is purging the military of officers who display insufficient socialistic ardor. Can you shed any light on this?

I wanted to write about this this morning (yes, MLB, I saw your comment earlier) but I didn't have time to do more research. Will make that a priority tomorrow.

Oh, and what Sly said - it's wonderful to see you AFE :) I was grinning from ear to ear when I saw your name this morning.

Posted by: Cass at November 4, 2013 07:18 PM

I was so looking hoping to read your enlightened view of the accomodations and culinary delights that our Greenpeace *friends* can look forward to during the extended winter vacation.
As for Peggy, she don't know borscht. Not once did I hear her complain about her beet ration. I mean, seriously.

Posted by: DL Sly at November 4, 2013 07:30 PM

Howdy again AFE,
I humbly suggest you broaden your horizons, and lampoon (ok, maybe just advertise how he mocks himself) Sarkozy. Gosh, if you are sufficiently non-partisan, perhaps you might even throw rocks at Berlusconi? European comics (is it wrong for me to assume there are some?) should Shirley contribute a commission (residuals) to each for a few years.

You casually joke about 'loyalty pledges' from military officers; I assure you that that is *exactly* what is happening in the General Officer corps (incl admirals). Look up recent comments by current Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and cross ref against sniveling Vichy sycophant.

Very Best Regards,

Posted by: CAPT Mike at November 4, 2013 10:13 PM

Thanks for the kind words all.
Cass: I enjoyed your post on the military situation. Given the historical tendency of Bolsheviks like Great Leader Obama to purge the officer corps, and then appoint political commissars to watch and denounce the survivors, it at least seemed a plausible concern to me.

That reminds of a favorite Soviet Bloc joke. When your reality is living under a brutal dictatorship, the humor tends to be dark and cynical. You laugh, so you don't have to cry. So here goes: Why do secret policemen always travel in threes? One can read, one can write, and one is there to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

I had thought about doing a play on the way Sarkozy pronounces his last name -- turn him into a wannabe french rapper, MC Sarko-Z, but then he lost power to Bolshevik in ill-fitting suit #37, right out of studio casting. Monsieur Andorra is as interesting as reading the tax code.

I had also considered Berlusconi, but how can I caricature him more than he has already done for himself. Way too clownish. Perhaps a visual medium would have worked -- have him prance around in Harlequin tights, spouting pseudo-philosophical crap like "the emptiness of infinity is like the pasta bolognese" and then do an interpretive dance of the ennui of the Piazza San Marco or the Pia Zadora, but that would be too Fellini-esque. Plus, visual arts are not my forte, and I lack sufficient navel-gazing to be properly avant-garde.

Putin had possibilities, but as a former KGB Colonel in the "good old days" of the Soviet Union, he probably had smashed someone's skull into jelly with a hammer down in the dank underground cells of Lyubyanka Prison, so I was worried that the humor would get too dark too quickly.

I will keep thinking about new possibilities, but stick to Obama for the near future. After all, he has indeed turned out to be a healer and uniter. He has gotten everyone in the Mideast so angry at him, or disgusted with his fecklessness, that he may single-handedly heal the Sunni-Shia Schism in Islam by uniting them through their hatred of the US!

Posted by: a former european at November 6, 2013 02:11 AM

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