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May 02, 2014

Caption Contest - Kentucky Derby Edition

Alright, villains, the Kentucky Derby is tomorrow, so it seems appropriate that this is your next picture to snarkify.


Have at it.
And may the Farce be with you.

Posted by DL Sly at May 2, 2014 01:51 PM

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Oriental cultures have a long history of copying the successes of the Western cultures. Hoping to capitalize on the popularity of the Kentucky Derby, the Oriental organizers tried their own version--the "Kentucky relay race"!

During the first half lap, the jockey rides the horse--in the second half, the positions are reversed.

Instead of Mint Juleps, Sake is served.

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 2, 2014 02:53 PM

In horse racing, the best horses are made to carry extra weight--a "handicap" to assure parity.

Seizing on the idea, the Obama Administration decided to assure "equal outcome" by penalizing the most productive of Americans.

The result was predictable--universal mediocrity--where NOBODY was able to excel.

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 2, 2014 02:58 PM

Daichi-san had misconstrued the meaning of 'horsey set’.

Posted by: George Pal at May 2, 2014 03:33 PM

"Breaking Bad" wasn't the fastest horse around, but if he got out front the rest of the field would just drop back. Way, way back.

Posted by: spd rdr at May 2, 2014 06:54 PM

Silks for horses and jockeys have long been a part of horse racing, so owners and fans can identify the horse and jockey.

In the Oriental Derby, the "silks" were not so colorful--only purple with a streak of brown.

The view from the back of the pack? "EEWWWW!"

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 2, 2014 07:58 PM

In yet another example of Oriental emulation of Western customs, the jockeys seen here are adopting the NASCAR custom of "drafting"--avoiding the headwind drag of the first in line by falling in "close behind" in order to run more efficiently.

It gives NEW MEANING to the term "Breaking Wind."

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 2, 2014 08:30 PM

Having seen "Buffalo Bill's Wild West" in "Annie Get Your Gun, Yoshi decided to give "trick riding" a try.

In this photo, he reprises the Western show staple of riding a horse while standing up.

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 2, 2014 08:52 PM

Where is ASPCA when you need them?

Posted by: CAPT Mike at May 2, 2014 09:02 PM

the camel was lucky to have his back broken by a final straw; not so this poor horse.

Posted by: CAPT Mike at May 2, 2014 09:05 PM

Crouching jockey, stumbling horsey

Posted by: Don Brouhaha at May 2, 2014 10:16 PM

The entire field, with the exception of number 14, was mysteriously affected by an unknown chemical emission which caused them to slow their pace.

Posted by: CAPT Mongo at May 3, 2014 08:31 AM

Riff--It's not that #14 was SLOW--it's that those behind (horses and jockeys alike) would do ANYTHING not to see that!

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 3, 2014 11:54 AM

It's hardly the "Royal Ascot Opening Day", is it?

Now it can be shown why Eliza Doolittle was exhorting her horse.

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 3, 2014 02:38 PM


Posted by: Melissa Fletcher at May 4, 2014 08:57 AM

To prevent saddle sores next time wear pants.

Posted by: Melissa Fletcher at May 4, 2014 09:01 AM

When Eliza Doolittle shouted "Dover, move your bloomin' arse!" in My Fair Lady, it is now apparent she was talking to the sumo wrestler--not the horse.

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 4, 2014 11:51 AM

My ankle flexibility is just fine, thank you very much.

In a related story, following the race, the horse had to be shot as all 4 of it's ankles were broken.

Posted by: Yu-Ain Gonnano at May 6, 2014 12:43 PM

The horse got a reprieve, but had to retire from racing. Here's a photo of the horse after his harrowing experience.

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 6, 2014 03:26 PM

Horse stance, I'm doing it wrong.

Posted by: htom at May 7, 2014 02:47 AM

As much as the horse struggled with the extra weight, he looked at the bright side--they were not participating in STEEPLECHASE--jumping over fences and ditches.

Posted by: frequent flyer at May 8, 2014 07:49 PM